2012, ISBN: 9780857207241

Penguin Books. Good. 8.1 x 5.3 x 0.7 inches. Paperback. 2003. 288 pages. Text tanned.<br>In this eye-opening resource, Dr. Sal Severe taps his twenty-five years of experience as a … Mehr…

Penguin Books. Good. 8.1 x 5.3 x 0.7 inches. Paperback. 2003. 288 pages. Text tanned.<br>In this eye-opening resource, Dr. Sal Severe taps his twenty-five years of experience as a school psych ologist and parenting workshop leader to show that a child's beha vior is often a reflection of the parent's behavior, and by makin g changes themselves, parents can achieve dramatic results in the ir children. Instead of focusing on what children do wrong, Dr. S evere teaches parents to emphasize the positive, to be consistent , and to be more patient. He shows parents how to teach their chi ldren to behave, listen, and be more cooperative, and how moms an d dads can manage their own anger and prevent arguments and power struggles. Packed with concrete strategies for dealing with home work hassles, ending tantrums, and other common problems, Dr. Sev ere's empathetic, common-sense book will be welcome everywhere. Editorial Reviews Review The book gives parents the confidence t hey need to practice self-discipline, patience, and consistency i n order to raise well-behaved children. --New York Daily News Th is book speaks to the heart of the family system--the parents. Pa rents must behave so their children will, too! --John Bradshaw I found this to be a very valuable book. It has helped me immensel y with my own children. --Jack Canfield About the Author Dr. Sal Severe has been a school psychologist for more than twenty-five years. He serves on the advisory board of Parents magazine and is a member of the National Association of School Psychologists. Dr . Severe is also the author of How to Behave So Your Preschooler Will, Too! Excerpt. Reprinted by permission. All rights reserve d. Chapter 1 (How Successful Parents Behave) Whenever I am asked if my children have ever done something I was unprepared to hand le, I tell this story. Anthony was almost three years old when my spouse became pregnant. We knew it was vital to prepare him for the arrival of a new baby. We wanted to avoid the dreaded effects of sibling rivalry. We read the Berenstain Bears New Baby book a dozen times. We did everything imaginable to make him feel that our new baby was also going to be his new baby. As Mom's tummy be gan to grow, Anthony kept a little doll tucked beneath the front of his T-shirt. Leah's birth fascinated Anthony. He was so excit ed. Nearly everyone who brought a present for Leah brought one fo r him. It was like Christmas in May. He loved his new sister, eve n though he noticed that she did not have any teeth. Everything w as going just as we had planned. On Leah's sixth day home, it ha ppened. Anthony hopped out of the bathtub. His rosy skin smelled like soap and baby powder. He asked if he could have an apple. I said sure. He reappeared a few moments later and placed one hand on the back of my chair while holding the apple in the other. Da d, I think I'm in trouble. What for? I asked. Well, when I was getting my apple, I accidentally peed in the refrigerator. You'r e right, I said. You are in trouble. What We Want My children c reate many challenging situations. Occasionally I am amused. Ofte n I feel frustrated and discouraged. Sometimes I feel embarrassed and guilty. Our children are a measure of our success and worthi ness. We judge ourselves by their success and achievements. We co mpare ourselves to other parents, and compare our children to oth er children. Have you ever watched people buy apples? We rotate e ach apple looking for a blemish. We hold it up to the light, exam ining the reflection. We squeeze each one for firmness. We study each competitor looking for the perfect apple. Parents want perf ect apples. We want successful children, happy and well adjusted. We want them to feel good about themselves. We want children who are loving and respectful of others, well behaved, and self-moti vated. We want them to be independent-not still living with us wh en they are thirty. All parents have the same goals and aspiratio ns. What We Have Most parents confront the same behavior proble ms. We become annoyed repeating everything three times. We spend too much time arguing. We become drained from the nagging and whi ning and manipulating and quarreling, and exhausted from shouting and threatening. At times, it seems that all we do is punish. We feel guilty for getting angry, but it appears to be the only way to get results. We blame ourselves and feel ineffective for not knowing what to do. There are times when we dislike our children because their misbehavior makes us feel so inadequate and miserab le. Raising well-behaved children is not easy. Many parents fail not because they are inadequate or because they lack love for th eir children or because they want something less than the best fo r their children, but because they are inconsistent. They procras tinate. They give warnings but do not follow through. They say th ings they do not mean. They lack patience. They punish in anger. Unsuccessful parents attend to the negative rather than the posit ive. They criticize too much. Parents who have discipline problem s do not plan. They do not realize that they can be part of the p roblem. Parents are part of the problem because of their pattern s of reaction. Parents usually react in one of two ways. Sometime s parents react passively; they give in to misbehavior because th ey do not feel like confronting the problem, at least not right t hen. You will learn why giving in makes misbehavior worse. Someti mes parents react with anger. You can also learn how reacting wit h anger makes misbehavior worse. The way you react to your child ren's misbehavior affects future misbehavior. A certain amount of misbehavior is normal; my guess is that young children misbehave about 5 percent of the time. (Some days it feels like 50 percent !) Knowing how to react to this 5 percent is crucial. Reacting co rrectly and consistently can reduce misbehavior from 5 percent to less than 2 percent while reacting incorrectly can increase misb ehavior to 10 percent or more. Knowing how to react is essential , but knowing how to prevent discipline problems is more importan t. You can escape many predicaments by setting up a few guideline s in advance. Successful parents believe in prevention and planni ng; they are more proactive than reactive. You will learn several strategies to help you be more proactive. What We Need What fa ctors contribute to successful parenting? Successful parents and their children are partners in discipline. Successful parents kno w that discipline is a teaching process, not just punishment. Suc cessful parents understand that their behavior and emotions affec t their children's behavior and emotions. Successful parents mode l responsibility; they focus their attention and energy on the po sitive aspects of their children's behavior and emphasize coopera tion, not control. Successful parents teach their children to thi nk for themselves. They teach children self-control. Successful p arents build self-esteem. They know that healthy self-esteem is t he main ingredient children need to develop self-confidence and r esiliency. Successful parents learn from their children. They de velop reaction patterns that reduce misbehavior. Successful paren ts are consistent; they say what they mean and mean what they say . They follow through. Successful parents stay calm when their bu ttons are being pushed. They use punishments that teach, not get even. Successful parents connect special activities with good beh avior. Successful parents anticipate problems. They have a game plan. They have proactive strategies for managing tantrums, disob edience, fighting, arguments, and power struggles. Successful par ents have plans that teach the value of completing chores, earnin g allowances, and doing homework. Successful parents do not let misbehavior keep them from enjoying their children. Successful pa rents are strict but positive. They are serious about the importa nce of proper conduct, but they have a childlike sense of humor w henever it is needed. Successful parents know how to appreciate t heir children, even when they are misbehaving. Most importantly, successful parents are open to change. How This Book Will Help This book will make your life easier. This book teaches you how t o get your children to listen the first time you ask them to do s omething. It teaches you how to be more consistent. It shows you how to get your children to behave without getting angry. It expl ains how to use incentives without bribing. It shows you how to u se punishments that teach. It explains how to punish your childre n without feeling punished yourself. It teaches you how to correc t your children without arguments and power struggles. It empower s you to handle teasing and tantrums. It will even tell you what to do when one of your children pees in the refrigerator. If you already have well-behaved children, thank your higher power. Thi s book will help you, too. It will make you more conscious of the successful strategies you are currently using. This book will sh ow you how to maintain good behavior, and it will prepare you for any future problems. One of the best sources of help for parent s is other parents. I realized this after watching parents who ha ve attended my parenting workshops. It's thrilling to see parents pick each other's brains for techniques. They find ideas that wi ll stop Jonathan's tantrums or get Heather to do her homework or get the twins to stop fighting. This book is a collection of idea s that I have learned from parents-parents who were fatigued and confused, parents drained by yelling, parents who felt imprisoned by their children, parents who walked through life on a treadmil l, parents whose hearts were empty, parents who sometimes felt li ke giving up. Parents who discovered a better way. All the examp les in this book are true stories from actual parents with real p roblems. The ideas in this book are simple and practical. Everyth ing is explained in down-to-earth language. There are a number o f theories about parent and child behavior. Most authors accept o ne theory. They try to convince you that their ideas work for eve ry parent and every child. After trying this approach, I decided it was insufficient. Since every parent and child is unique, why not use a variety of methods? Use the best from every theory. Thi s book provides hundreds of ideas. Not all of them will work all the time. You need to select the ideas that make sense to you. H ow We Learn Parenting Behavior We learned most of our parenting behavior from our parents. Have you ever said something to your c hildren and then realized you heard these same words-Be careful o r you'll break your neck, Be quiet and eat-when you were a child? We parent the way we were parented. We discipline as we were dis ciplined. Most ideas that we learned from our parents are helpful , but some are not. We pick and choose from these methods. Things we like, we use. Things we do not like, we don't. We also learn by watching other parents for good ideas and by talking with fri ends. We learn from their experiences, they learn from ours, and we share techniques that work. We also learn by trial and error. Much of what we do with our children is based on our best guess at the time. Some things work; some fail. This happens to us all. Every firstborn child is a test; we begin using trial and error the moment we get home from the hospital. I remember feeling conf used and helpless. The baby is crying-what does it mean? Hungry? Lonely? Wet? Too warm? Too cold? Trial and error also applies to discipline: if sending your child to bed early works once, you wi ll probably do it again. The beliefs that you already have about parenting and discipline are fine. Learning from your parents an d friends and learning by trial and error is normal. Add judgment and common sense, and you have a solid foundation. This book wil l build on that foundation. Love Does Not Always Light the Way Too many parents have the false belief that if they love their ch ildren as much as possible, their misbehavior will someday improv e. Love, warmth, and affection are essential. They are fundamenta ls. But you also need knowledge. Imagine you needed an operation . As you were about to be put under, your physician whispered in your ear, I want you to know that I am not a surgeon. I'm not a d octor at all. Please don't worry. My parents are both doctors. I have a lot of friends who are doctors. I've asked a lot of questi ons about surgery. Just relax! I have a lot of common sense, and I love my patients very much. Would you let this person use a sca lpel on you? Parents need training just as professionals need tr aining. Children need trained parents as much as they need loving parents. Training pulls together all the good ideas you already have, provides structure and direction, and gives you confidence. You learn that what you are doing is right. More confidence mean s more self-control, less anger, less guilt, and less frustration . More confidence means more respect from your children. Without confidence, many parents are afraid to correct or punish their ch ildren. Some worry that their children will not like them or are afraid they might harm their children emotionally, so they let th eir children misbehave. It Wasn't Like That When I Was Growing U p Why doesn't discipline work the way it did twenty or thirty ye ars ago? Why don't the old-fashioned methods work? Why is being a parent so demanding and confusing? Parenting is more difficult b ecause childhood is more difficult. Children are under pressure-p ressure to make adult decisions with the experience and emotions of a child; pressure from peers; pressure from school; pressure f rom the media; pressure that seeps down from pressures on the par ents. Pressure on our children translates into problems for us. Several changes in our culture have had a tremendous impact on di scipline and our roles as parents. Our economy has created financ ial tension in families. Parents come home stressed. Their fuse i s short. The rising divorce rate affects all of our children; tod ay, there are schools where four out of five children have experi enced divorce. Single parenting is stressful. Twenty years ago, everyone in the same town or neighborhood had the same values and beliefs. No matter where you went to play, the rules were the sa me. Everyone's parents had the same expectations. This is no long er true. Every family has its own standards. Our children experie nce many versions of right and wrong. This is confusing to childr en. How do these changes in our society affect the way you disci pline your children? Why won', Penguin Books, 2003, 2.5, Simon & Schuster. Very Good. 234mm / 153mm. Paperback. 2012. 384 pages. <br>'It is never what you worry over that comes to pas s in the end. The real catastrophies are always different - unima gined, unprepared for, unknown...' What if our 24-hour day grew l onger, first in minutes, then in hours, until day becomes night a nd night becomes day? What effect would this slowing have on the world? On the birds in the sky, the whales in the sea, the astron auts in space, and on an eleven-year-old girl, grappling with emo tional changes in her own life..' One morning, Julia and her pare nts wake up in their suburban home in California to discover, alo ng with the rest of the world, that the rotation of the earth is noticeably slowing. The enormity of this is almost beyond compreh ension. And yet, even if the world is, in fact, coming to an end, as some assert, day-to-day life must go on. Julia, facing the lo neliness and despair of an awkward adolescence, witnesses the imp act of this phenomenon on the world, on the community, on her fam ily and on herself. ., Simon & Schuster, 2012, 3<

2012, ISBN: 0857207245

[EAN: 9780857207241], Near Fine, [PU: Simon & Schuster, UK], SCIENCE FICTION & FANTASY BZDB5 FANTASY; THE AGE OF MIRACLES, Trade Paperback. 371 pages. *** PUBLISHING DETAILS: Simon & Schu… Mehr…

[EAN: 9780857207241], Near Fine, [PU: Simon & Schuster, UK], SCIENCE FICTION & FANTASY BZDB5 FANTASY; THE AGE OF MIRACLES, Trade Paperback. 371 pages. *** PUBLISHING DETAILS: Simon & Schuster, UK, 2012. *** CONDITION: This book is in near fine condition. Lightly tanned pages. *** ABOUT THIS BOOK: WHAT IF our 24-hour day grew longer, first in minutes, then in hours until day becomes night and night becomes day? 'It is never what you worry over that comes to pass in the end. The real catastrophies are always different - unimagined, unprepared for, unknown.' What if our 24-hour day grew longer, first in minutes, then in hours, until day becomes night and night becomes day? What effect would this slowing have on the world? On the birds in the sky, the whales in the sea, the astronauts in space, and on an eleven-year-old girl, grappling with emotional changes in her own life.? One morning, Julia and her parents wake up in their suburban home in California to discover, along with the rest of the world, that the rotation of the earth is noticeably slowing. The enormity of this is almost beyond comprehension. And yet, even if the world is, in fact, coming to an end, as some assert, day-to-day life must go on. Julia, facing the loneliness and despair of an awkward adolescence, witnesses the impact of this phenomenon on the world, on the community, on her family and on herself. *** Quantity Available: 1. Category: Science Fiction & Fantasy; ISBN/EAN: 9780857207241. Inventory No: 13020255. The photo of this book is of the actual book for sale., Books<

2012, ISBN: 9780857207241

Simon & Schuster, UK, 2012. Trade Paperback. Near Fine. Trade Paperback. 371 pages. *** PUBLISHING DETAILS: Simon & Schuster, UK, 2012. *** CONDITION: This book is in near fi… Mehr…

Simon & Schuster, UK, 2012. Trade Paperback. Near Fine. Trade Paperback. 371 pages. *** PUBLISHING DETAILS: Simon & Schuster, UK, 2012. *** CONDITION: This book is in near fine condition. Lightly tanned pages. *** ABOUT THIS BOOK: WHAT IF our 24-hour day grew longer, first in minutes, then in hours until day becomes night and night becomes day? 'It is never what you worry over that comes to pass in the end. The real catastrophies are always different - unimagined, unprepared for, unknown...' What if our 24-hour day grew longer, first in minutes, then in hours, until day becomes night and night becomes day? What effect would this slowing have on the world? On the birds in the sky, the whales in the sea, the astronauts in space, and on an eleven-year-old girl, grappling with emotional changes in her own life..? One morning, Julia and her parents wake up in their suburban home in California to discover, along with the rest of the world, that the rotation of the earth is noticeably slowing. The enormity of this is almost beyond comprehension. And yet, even if the world is, in fact, coming to an end, as some assert, day-to-day life must go on. Julia, facing the loneliness and despair of an awkward adolescence, witnesses the impact of this phenomenon on the world, on the community, on her family and on herself. *** Quantity Available: 1. Category: Science Fiction & Fantasy; ISBN/EAN: 9780857207241. Inventory No: 13020255.. 9780857207241, Simon & Schuster, 2012, 4<